'Okay' feels amazing
This week has been pretty incredible.
I mean, Covid-19 is still a thing, I am still pretty much locked in my house, I miss all my friends and making deep physical connections. But, week commencing 9th November 2020 has been the first week that I've actually felt considerably calmer, happier, appreciative of who I am.
Throughout the entire month of October, I cried every day. Waking up and getting out of bed was as hard as that time I climbed Mount Toubkal and nearly died.
I haven't felt like that in an entire week. And although I know that this process isn't a single upwards trajectory, it feels amazing to be 'okay' right now.
'Okay' may seem like a mediocre word, but it is not. Right now, 'okay' is pretty fucking ace.
I've been quite strict with myself the last week or so, and I've made a commitment to continue doing things that make me fall in 'love' with myself again — actually I dislike the expression 'to fall in love' — it indicates that you have no control of what you're falling into. I much prefer to simply walk into being in love with myself. Anyway, that's not the point.
Some things that have helped in this 'okay' peak:
Make a decision to not want to feel like this any more
Wake up and stretch or do yoga
Release unfulfilling connections
Say nice things to yourself — honestly, I thought this was bullshit for years, but it actually works!